Unravelled Read online

  Since my messy-hair look doesn’t take too much time, I took special care with my make-up and spent more time on it than on anything else. I made sure that it’s subtle and highlights my cheekbones. I spend more time on my make-up than on anything else. And I had to start over three times. The first time I overdid the eyes in an attempt to hide what is left of my discoloured eye and I landed up looking like one of Jamie’s Goth girl-friends. The second time I sneezed just after I applied mascara and since I learned that lesson at great expense to my dignity, I started over again. I feel confident that even Juan would approve of my third attempt.

  A spotlight is switched on from the back of the barn and lights up the stage, which startles Blossom and I’m glad for the hum of conversation – knowing this animal, he just released a startled fart. Everyone settles, a hush descends on the barn and the air crackles with anticipation. The music is switched off and there, from the left of the barn, Adam walks towards the stage. He looks into the crowd, but can’t see much because the spotlights are aimed at the stage and most likely just blinded him. Is he looking for me? I look at him from my safe vantage point and something in me goes completely still.

  He walks to the stage in long, confident strides. He is dressed in a black evening suit with a silver grey tie and is cleanly shaved. I can almost smell him. He climbs the three steps to the stage and I’m sure, more sure than I’ve been of anything in my life, including the time I was sure that Blossom was the reincarnation of my grandfather, that Adam is the man I want to spend the rest of my life with. I feel my heart quieten down from all its doubts and confusion and grow with something that’s very warm and much bigger than me.

  In my mind’s eye I see his house, Blossom running around in it and throwing himself down with a fart on the rug in the den. I see us swimming in the pool and Adam uselessly trying to get me to swim with my face in the water – I don’t like getting my nose wet. Images of him bringing our ritual hot chocolate into the den at night and me cuddling next to him while we watch a silly movie flash before me and I know.

  “I love you.”

  The collective turn of heads towards the back of the barn makes me realise that I’ve just said that out loud. Maybe a little bit too loud. And of course at this moment everyone quietened down for the opening speech.

  While watching Adam getting on stage, I must have stepped out from behind the pillar, because I am now in full view of God and all the invited guests of Villsburg’s Annual Art Festival. I close my eyes for a second and place my hand over my mouth, but remove it just as quick when I remember my meticulously applied lipstick and don’t want to smudge it. So I take a breath and remind myself of all the lectures and tips I received from Juan, Bart, my mother and Erin. I pull in my stomach which immediately lifts my boobs, I lift my chin, pull my shoulders back which pushes my boobs out even more and look straight at Adam.

  He can’t have heard my declaration, because he is fussing with his notes for his speech. At one point he realises that there is an eerie silence in the hall and looks up and starts squinting into the crowd. It takes his eyes a few moments to get used to the lights and I know the exact moment when he sees me standing as large as life in the back of this converted barn. He looks at me and then at Blossom who is uncharacteristically quiet next to me, and raises his one eyebrow. The corner of his mouth is doing something, but I’m not close enough to see what it is and interpret it. He looks at me expectantly and I don’t need to be close to see that it’s also a look of relief.

  “I love you.” I say louder and start walking to the front feeling the eyes of everyone on me, but not caring one iota. Right now the only thing that I care about is the man I’m walking towards. “I think I loved you the first time you were barking into your fancy smart phone on the side of the road, yet I just never saw it.” A few men snort in amusement and immediately get ribbed by their teary wives. I walk and talk faster and find that I can’t take my eyes off the man that I love so deeply. “I’m just so sorry that I didn’t see this earlier.”

  I climb the stairs to the stage without mishap and stand right in front of Adam. He smells just like I knew he would. “If your offer still stands, the answer is yes.”

  He looks at me with melting tenderness and takes my hand in his. He pulls me closer and to the unfortunate applause and cheering of the whole barn gives me a kiss that undoubtedly smudges my lipstick all over my mouth. It’s the feel of a large hairy head trying to push between us that forces us to come up for air and Adam turns to the mike with a fair amount of my lipstick on his mouth.

  “Ladies and gentlemen, I would like to present you the woman who made all this possible and,” he turns to me and smile, “my fiancée, Ms Fields.”

  I wipe as much lipstick as I can from around my mouth while the whole barn erupts in a cacophony of romantic happiness, and with my hand on my heart, which I know will be safe and loved, start my opening speech.